Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Monday in Michigan - Challenges

This week finds me preoccupied, again. Last week both Kris and I were  - to the point that on Wednesday we both realized we'd not done our Monday and Tuesday posts! Neither one of us did - that's some crazy stuff!

This week is not shaping up to be much better. Last week, for some reason, the real unraveling of my child began. Ever since he'd had that stomach flu and then witnessed a few of his classmates get sick at school with it, he's been having issues. All kinds of them. Saying he's constantly nauseated, afraid to get sick at school, afraid to get sick period (and I can't blame him, it's not like it's any fun and he that flu really BAD), I can't get him to eat like he used to - I've actually heard "I don't want to eat that because I don't want to throw something like that up!". Before we walk into restaurants he's said "I don't want to get sick here!", and on and on and on. Now, it's escalated to the point where he won't let me leave him at school.

It started simply enough, we'd get there and occasionally a few tears and the "I don't feel good" statements would start. So, what's a mom to do but listen and I take him home those few times. But when we'd get home, I'd noticed it wasn't too long and he's feeling better. Not all the time mind you - just the past couple times I've brought him home. I try to explain to him that he can't stay home on the chance he may get sick, and that if he did actually get sick, I'd come get him. At this point I think he's making himself sick with worry. Literally it's the worry/anxiety taking on a physical form.

As I said, started simply enough, but now, it's out of control to the point it's affecting his daily functioning. The past 3 school mornings have been horrible. We're fine until we get to the school. Then the tears start along with the statement of "I'm not going". I've been able to get him out of the car, but we're not out of the woods yet, then we get in and he's had to be literally pulled off of me as it's turned into "I want my mom! I want my mom!" and he's crying and carrying on the whole time with the "I want my mom/mama!" going on. It's heartbreaking! And so not like my boy. He never had these issues - he used to barely kiss me goodbye when I walked him in and he'd be off, heading toward the cafeteria to get breakfast never once glancing back! This is all just not him.

Yesterday I had a meeting with his wonderful teacher. She's awesome and I am so glad he's got her (and that I've got her to work with!), she's so caring and compassionate and focused to help her kids succeed. She also involved the school's Elementary Success worker, he's fabulous as well! So, the three of us sat down and tried to figure out what's going on and what we can do about it to get him past all of this and back to the happy little boy who enjoyed going to school. And eating there and in eating period, even if he was picky.

We're leaning toward the anxiety/separation anxiety thing along with being "traumatized", for lack of a better term, by the illness (that stomach flu), and seeing the friends get sick in school etc. Then the separation anxiety issue from being sick and home with me the whole time, then Spring Break and being with me some more. Maybe even some issues caused by seeing me come down with that nasty bug too and being laid up for a few days. To cover all the bases though, he does have a doctor's appointment - to rule in or out any physical cause to the nausea and tummy issues. At the school meeting, we came up with a new morning drop-off plan, geared to making the transition to school - and away from me - much easier on him. And quieter and less stressful - therefore less anxiety provoking. I am hoping that between these efforts and the doctor's appointment, that we can get him back on track. All of these issues are spilling over into his home-life too, pretty soon there won't be anywhere that's "good" for him at this rate. I am so glad we are taking action to nip it in the bud - better now than before it gets worse, if that's possible, which I'm sure it is, lol.

Today we started the new routine. It didn't go very well. But as Kris reminded me, it's only the first day. And, tomorrow is another day! ;-)

Keep on keeping on,
Tracey :-)

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